So, I haven’t been on in a really long time but I thought it was time to come back. I’m coming back because of a conversation I had with some friends a few days ago.

    So here it goes…..

I think it is a great idea to have a safe place to express your feelings. I know that everyone has feelings that sometimes they just need to release; however, I think people need to also sensor some of the things they say. I mean…have you ever read something on this website or another social networking website and realized that that person should NOT have put that up? I have…many times. Particularly some written by friends. When you say you are friends with someone, please don’t post things you don’t want them to see. And if your going to post about people, don’t be a hypocrit. Don’t yell at someone or make them a seem like a bad person when in reality you are doing the same thing. This happened to my friend and it has taken me a long time to stand up for her but I finally am.

To my friend Sam, I love you.

I can’t deal with this…i fucking hate people. Why can’t people just be honest and shit. I need to vent but even this doesnt help…I KNOW noone sees this.

I know it seems all I talk about are guys and how much I hate them and blah blah blah..and I’m sure you’re sick of it…I am. But today I got to see “my guy.” I put it in quotes because he isn’t actually my guy, man, boy friend or whatever you want to call him. He’s a really good friend that I like but is married. This totally sucks because he likes me—hates his wife—or at least fights with her and talks about her enough. We’ve kissed and when I’m with him, he just makes me happy. I love spending time with him. Is that so wrong?

So as of last semester and even yesterday I was DONE with orchestra at Hofstra. Dr. Ramael had really hurt and I had felt disrespected me. But a “nice guy” (as he put it) at Hofstra told me there is way too much drama in our department…and its true. Thinking about it, I realized that he is soooo right. There is way too much of it. Were musicians not actors. Drama is NOT out life and we shouldn’t make it a part of it. We are the future teachers of the world, drama doesn’t bode well with our future bosses. So now thinking about my situation, I realized something a bit more near and dear to my own life; Ramael was NOT out to get me. He did not do what he did purposefully to hurt me, nor did he know that it hurt me. I as an adult did not speak up to him and tell him how i felt. If he knew he probably would have apologized or even corrected it. So today I feel that I grew up a bit. I took a step in the right direction. I told myself, MUSIC not DRAMA is my life and I want all aspects of drama out of my life. I picked myself and my violin up today and I went to orchestra. Not only that, but I actually had a conversation with him. He’s not a bad guy and his goal is not to hurt me. In response, I had a great rehearsal. I was able to sight read the music and I felt that I was actually making some sort of music out of it.

I have a new found respect for myself and my playing. I know I’m not the best player, and I don’t need to be, but I know that I can play and that is all I want to accomplish.

Thank you to the “nice guy” that helped me realize this. Maybe starting today I will have a little more confidence in myself.

Why do they think that they have the right to get mad over shit? LIke this guy texts me this morning asking if I’d be his Valentine and I said no, I already have one. We proceed to argue about it until im like, “you have no right to be about about this.” Boy is this guy obnoxious. He said he can do what he likes. I was like, dude grow up. fight continues and I should have said to fuck off. Why didn’t I?

It totally sucks when the guy you like is taken and to make matters worse he likes you. But in my case he’s not just taken, he’s married. Whenever I see him, we have a great time but I feel I can never talk to him otherwise because if he’s home, she is there. What do I do?

Well Hi everyone, a good friend told me about this website and I thought it would be a great way to get all my feelings out. So…here I go. These last few weeks have been really crazy for me in the guy department and I gotta say, I’m kinda hating men right now. All they ever do is cause trouble and they’re always gonna do what they want to anyway. Most of the time they dont even think about how it will affect you and they’re just ASS WHOLES. My ex decided to date one of my BEST FRIENDS less than a week after we broke up. WTF??? I mean really. Thats soo not right. And as for her?…well shes just a lying whore. Who needs friends like that.